Well here we are again, a visit with the Crone.
All the symptoms of Cronehood abounding!
Suffice it to say hot flashes and humidity do not mix. Nay Nay.
If you recall, the 'list' of things a Crone might experience 'itching' was one of them. This had pretty much escaped me for the most part.
(HAD was the key word)
The itch has started. You REALLY don't want to know where it's started, honest you don't, but I'll give you a clue.
(Hmm how does one say this with tact and decorum?)
Let me put it this way..what does a man with sweaty balls do? He scratches them. Lately, I've looked like a man with sweaty balls......mmmk?
That is where the itch will happen. Oh yes sister crones, the crotch. It will feel like you're two days out from a complete shave with the hair just starting to grow back. It comes and goes. And before you ask, no I don't 'have' anything. No yeast infection, no other type of infection either.
I've been tempted to shave it again.............
(which I have not done in forever! pffft..what for!?)
But there's a problem with that...I can't see it anymore. Ok..not exactly true, but REACHING it to shave would be a struggle.
(remember..fat southern women here..mmk)
I'm not that limber anymore. Nope. Not even. Not gonna try either. I'd be sore for days from the stretching, grunting and groaning just trying to reach everywhere!
This 'itching' comes in stages too, much like the power surges. One day you will, one day you won't. One minute you will, one minute you won't.
Just so you'll know, it doesn't only itch there either. Wherever you may have hair growth, you will have itch. It seems the more hair, the more intense the itch. Go figure.
I'm beginning to think this is just a different form of chinese water torture. Uhmmhmm. Yep.
You can bathe, and scrub, powder and puff and it will not go away. Not until it's damned good and ready.
I'm lucky though. I'm home alone a lot so scratching where I itch is a given. Just remember to cut your nails.... short.
The Crone of Crotch Itch
Sage
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