Ohh the cruel mistress of mother nature.
The foolish
tricks she plays on us silly underling mortals..and she takes great joy
in it I believe. I hear her laughing manically as she creates havoc in
one's life, (read MY LIFE)..seriously.
Several months
ago I wrote of the 'schmeer's that she was plaguing me with. The last
schmeers lasted 2 weeks. Never enough to 'wear' anything, just there
when I'd wipe my ass with toilet paper, I could see that slight pinkish
schmeer. I suffered the ill consequences of a period too..the bloating
(heaven forbid..it does get worse as you become menopausal..get ready
for it) the cramps..ohmygawd the cramps, headache, stomach out of whack,
screwed up digestion..all of it. And just a schmeer.
She
gave me my comeuppance. My schmeer hung on for nearly 3 weeks...3 weeks
I tell you. Then..it stopped, just about 5 days ago..it stopped. I was
glad..thankgoodness!
I was glad until today that is. She's
back..Aunt Flo decided I had been long enough without a proper
'visit'..so she decided that today..she come round and knock on my door.
First time she's visited beyond a schmeer in many moons.
WHY
OH WHY am I plagued with this curse AGAIN? I mean c'mon now...if I got
the powersurges going on..if I've got the itchy skin, the bloating and
all the lovely things that go along with meno-hell..why would mother
nature feel the need to bring this upon me again!?
Sad
thing is..I should have known it was coming. Four days ago, my boobs
were so tender..and HURTING HURTING HURTING (sleeping on my stomach.... squishing the boobs down) was impossible! Movement in general
was difficult! If my arms rubbed anywhere near them..and ohmygawd and
..I went up in size! I Swear to you ..they blew up like balloons!
(that was cool, cuz they were actually 'round' again..instead of looking
like 1/2 filled stretched out water balloons ya know...?) My bras were
tight, my clothes were tight, my pants bothered me..I ate and blew
up..like someone had put a bicycle tire pump up my ass and started
pumping. This lasted for 4 days..today things were on their way back to
normal..almost.WTH?
ARGHHHHH!!!!
Can I get off this train yet? When's the next stop?? Junction? Hell, I'll take a water tower and leap..
PS: this was written on the 4th..and posted by accident..elsewhere! ACK!!
